You know what grinds my gears?

A couple of days ago, The Plumber and I hit the two-year mark.

For anyone that knows me knows that up until now, my previous relationships have had the shelf life of a bottle of wine (in my case this is a day or two) or a block of cheese. Except nowhere near as satisfying and healthy. (Yes I consider cases of wine and kg’s of cheese healthy. This isn’t a health blog so no judgies)

Anyway, my point is, we’ve been dating for two years. I moved to Durban from Cape Town to be with this man. (I know right?) so realistically the plan isn’t to just be boyfriend and girlfriend forever. Eventually I want to be Mrs Plumber and he wants to be Mr Wine Guzzler. We are by no means close to that point and for now we’re just enjoying spending time together and getting to know each other all over again and bla bla insert romantic crap here.


What absolutely grinds my gears is people. Stupid people, asking the same stupid question… “So, when is the big day?” Why? What is the point of this? I understand if people ask and you’re already engaged.( Although I vote we stab the people who ask a couple that’s been engaged for five minutes that same question… with a fork).

It’s awkward. So if you are one of these people, stop that. Stop that right now!

Maybe they just don’t believe in marriage or maybe they are happy with their lives at this point and don’t want to complicate things. Maybe the girl is waiting for George Clooney to get a divorce so she can marry him or maybe the guy is waiting for a woman with beer flavored nipples and they’re just using each other for the time being. Who actually cares what the reason is? With the exception of good friends, who wont need to ask this question because you have probably already discussed it with them, it’s no one elses business so go away.

So, if there are people out there like me, who literally want to vomit in my hand and clap every time someone asks this, I have compiled a list of perfectly acceptable replies. Feel free to add any of your own that I could add to my list J

  • As soon as my sex change is complete, we’re gonna get hitched.
  • We want to wait until the Dalai Lama is in town so he can perform the ceremony.
  • My cousin’s uncles’ brother’s next door neighbour is allergic to weddings.
  • I have to bath my dad on weekends so there’s no time
  • 32nd of March

Don’t ask me why this bothers me so much, some people get upset when people wear Crocs or black socks with shorts. Oh, wait, that’s me and me again. Maybe there is some subconscious reason strongly tied to a bad experience with an over priced barbie doll and a lucky packet. Bottom line, it is one of the most irksome things I’ve experienced and im sure I’m not alone. If this gets even one person to stop asking other people who, then my job here is done.

Well, that’s my rant for the week over.

Catch you on the flipside

X x x